Attacking windmills...

It is hard being a parent. 

No matter what the family make up is, it is hard.  The pressures that we set on ourselves is so much more than what any society or child can put on us.  It is us, the person that sets our daily path, that either sets us up for success or some lofty ideal that we surely cannot attain (even if we try like crazy to chase those windmills).

I build mountains, I see dragons where there are kittens and when I see my kids sad and I see red, a brilliant, hot, blinding red.  I don't set out to be this way but it happens.  Something gets ain the path of what one of my kids wants and means something to them and I am out the door and ready to take on the world.  Sadly, I'm a bit more like Don Quixote some days...never quite reaching my goals or righting some wrongs.  But damnit, I'm going to try!

Life's little lessons....

"Thank you."
"Good job."
"I'm proud of you."

Those phrases seem simple enough.  I dare say fairly basic too!

Wouldn't it be nice if ALL children were thanked and celebrated the same way as those shining stars that you see center-stage?  Sometimes it is the quiet kid in the corner that gets forgotten because they haven't found their voice yet.  It would be nice for kids to be on a level playing field but frankly some kids go unnoticed and they feel that in a very real way.  I was talking with my daughter recently and discussing how sometimes adults don't do the right thing (and this can be for a million different situations and reasons).  It isn't because they don't care or they were neglectful it is that there are just so many kids and to acknowledge them all would be a lot of work.  It is still so hard to see the disappointment in her eyes. 

I hope for every disappointment she experiences that it is out numbered by the joyous moments in life.  Sadly, she is not alone in the disappointment.  I'm bit disappointed too but I have to be the grown up here.  She's bright and doesn't always have her light shining as brightly as she could due to the shadows of others she feels she lives in.  I'm working on that one with her.

I've been debating on my further action on some recent events.  This certainly isn't a huge moment in life in the grand scheme but for a 12 year old it is real and noticeable at this age.  I also know that 'MOM' can't and shouldn't fix everything.  I guess the lessons of growing up are not only for the young.  We are re-learning all the lessons we once learned growing up.  Hang on...I'm going to ask it....was my mom right?  Do I now understand that lesson too hard to grasp then because I have my own kids?  I'm adding it to the list of things I will be saying to my kids for sure!

I'm tired of excusing behavior away of those that don't do the right thing.  I think this time I will tell her the truth....and then I'll tell her that she'll understand it when she has children of her own too.

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